The yellow edible things in my closet

The gummi worms I’ve been eating are squiggly and striped, having four colored segments making up each one. Orange red orange red, white green white green, etc. When I eat a worm I eat it in four pieces, one colored band at a time, and I like to start with the tail. The reason for this is obvious – if you started with the head you’d be left with the tail, which is just silly, but by starting with the tail, you’re left with the head at the end, which aside from being a bit fuller and rounder than the rest of the worm has a little face. A definite plus.

There are exceptions to this of course. As I put down earlier, these worms are striped, and I personally like for the last segment of worm I eat to be the darker of the two colors that it is. If it’s red and yellow I’d like for the last bite to be red. A worm has a head, two middles, and a tail end. Let’s say that starting at the tail end my worm is (T) green, (M2) white, (M1) green, (H) white. This is not acceptable. I don’t want a lightly colored head to be my last bite, so in circumstances like these I reverse the order and start at the head to ensure a darker, and therefore more flavorful last bite, even if it has to be a tail.

So I was eating my worms (with some bears mixed in for variety) and I came across a worm that was only one segment long – a small deformed bit of worm that was only a yellow head that tapered off before it should have. I couldn’t eat it. It reminded me of the description in “Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator” of the Vicious Knids, those sinewy wormlike monsters that inhabited the space hotel, who could spell things like SCRAM! with their bodies. I think that my worm is a smaller kind of knid, but whether or not it’s vicious is yet to be determined. I decided to save it, and tried to think of vicious knid-ish names for it. The first name that came to mind was Edith. So its name is Edith. Where to put it? On the shelf in my closet of course. Why? Because there currently is another yellow pet of mine residing there.

In a clear plastic baggy with the top folded over, pinned to the edge of my shelf and hanging on display, is Schoenberg. He’s a small dinosaur fruit snack I picked up at work. I carried him around most of the day I found him, until one of my coworkers tore off his head out of spite. I performed a hurried surgery and managed to reattach Schoenberg’s head, then wrapped him in a pink paper napkin until I could get him home. I’ve probably had him for close to a year now. The other yellow pet I no longer possess. He was a worm. I suppose he could have just as easily been a snake, but I decided he was a worm. This worm was not edible - it was an ill-formed balloon animal. I named him Herbert Spencer, and toted him about with me before he shriveled into a small rubbery blob. Apparently he was not fit enough to survive.

I have no idea why I keep these things. I didn't realize it was kind of a collection until Edith came along, and I find it odd that they've all been yellow, as I've never given much thought to the color before now. Perhaps I have other color coded collections and know nothing about it. I'll have to keep an eye out.