Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Land sakes, her hair's as red as carrots!


As many of you know, I'm a redhead. People often compliment me on my hair, which I think is weird, seeing as how it's something completely out of my control, like my bone structure or shoe size. Usually it's people my own age, but sometimes it's old men who say things like "sure do like that hair of yours Red." The fact is, I haven't done anything to deserve a compliment, so how am I supposed to respond to that? Today as I entered a bathroom on campus a girl came out of a stall and said "Your hair color is truly gorgeous" so I said what I always say. "Thanks. I grew it myself."

After she left I realized I ought to shake things up a bit and come up with a new response. Any ideas? The best one I can think of would be to clutch my head and scream "It's not for sale! Get away from my hair!" and then run out of the room.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

in which I live to become one year older and wiser


I had a most satisfactory birthday this year. To recap, I received:

-a package from my in-laws containing the third season of Psych, scratch-off lottery tickets (I won $6), and some Dr. Seuss books, including the ABC book, which I had memorized as a child - Aunt Annie's alligators, A A A!

-M-Lite got me two books. How to Fix It is an illustrated guide to doing handy things, like counter-sinking screws and replacing broken window panes. Book two is the Manual of American Dialects for Radio, Stage, and Screen. Optimistic. and I laughed ourselves silly trying to decipher phrases in different dialects. For example, "EE gwAHin gibv UHm EE hAWs" translates to "He's going to give him his horse".

-Whistler gave me The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency as well as a box of tissues. I assume the two gifts are unrelated, but I haven't read the book yet, so who knows.

-Ahem and Uffish gave me the most surprising gift - Hungry Hungry Hippos, which I assembled on the spot, after reading the instructional booklet, which had sections titled things like "Has your hippo lost its head?". Best of all, the hippos have names, one of them being Bottomless Potamus.

-Optimistic. purchased me not one, but four Harry Potter movies, which he cleverly disguised by wrapping up action figures along with them to create lumps in the packaging. Uffish insisted we watch Goblet of Fire right then and there because the guy who plays Barty Crouch Jr. also plays Dr. Who.

-My birthday package from home contained nothing but awesomeness, including a check for me to purchase a sewing machine with, four Powell's Books pint glasses, a book about how to build tree houses, pirate stickers, and a water bottle full of WINCO gummi worms. However, I didn't find my package on the doorstep until I left for class in the morning, so I was forced to bring it inside and head for campus without opening it. I spent the whole day tortured by the thought of not knowing what was inside.

I went and purchased my sewing machine on Wednesday and got a terrific deal on it. However, I know that if I use it now I'll get distracted and several end-of-semester papers won't get written, so I'm keeping the box sealed until after finals.

My birthday also included receiving a text from First Draft that wished me a nappy birthday instead of a happy birthday. Being pro nap I'm hoping that phrase catches on.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Slasher III: This time it's financial


Budget cuts at work. Exciting times.